With Friends Like These, Part Deux

Still wrestling with the same issue as I wrote about in December. I don't think it's so much hate really because I don't want bad things to happen to them, but I am just so upset about a path they've taken to destroy the life of another friend. To be in the room with them is impossible to me because I just can't pretend it's not happening and be surface-social. I am incapable of that kind of BS. So this weekend when faced with fight or flight-- I fled.

And this morning I once again let the communion cup pass me by. It was too hard to swallow the symbol of forgiveness when the hand that passed it to me is the same hand gripping the knife in our Christian brother's back.

So if it's not hate I'm wrestling with then what is it? Anger? Yes. Shock? Certainly. Embarrassment? Oh yeah.

I finally put my finger on the feelings last night. I wish I could simply "unknow" them. Because knowing them has chipped away at my view of what the church is and who we are. We may not be perfect but there are lines we don't cross, if only to save face to the world. The malicious, purposeful destruction of another member of our body is one of those lines, or so I thought.